Noise, Noise, Noise. Nothing sets me off and gets under my skin quite like unnecessary background noise. I believe that it’s the main reason why I yell at my kids. Crazy huh?
Let me explain.
It usually starts off small…some light music playing in the background.
I start the dryer in the laundry room and leave the door open so the cat can get to her litter box.
The central A/C kicks on.
My kids get up…the baby starts whining out of hunger…my 4 year old starts talking.
I start making breakfast while trying to listen to my son’s big plans for the day.
I use our super loud microwave that turns on the vent when you use it.
I’m trying to hear what my son is telling me over all the background noise and I strain to hear him.
I raise my voice. “Tell me what you want to eat!”
I’m trying to cook breakfast and pay attention to what he’s saying, but I can’t hear him.
My baby is crying at my feet and I can’t handle it anymore.
I start yelling at my son to STOP TALKING!!! Wait, didn’t I just ask him a question? Whatever, I’m angry. I get frustrated at my sweet baby and tell him to STOP CRYING, and I lose it.
This scenario was getting pretty common. Almost every morning I’d yell while making breakfast.
Looking back, there was no reason at all why I should have been angry. My kids were not acting out or doing anything wrong. Most of the time, they were just being kids.
The problem was with me. There was just too much going on. My senses were overwhelmed and I couldn’t focus.
One morning, I stopped. I listened. I was amazed at how much noise there was. It was so dang loud in my house!
I shut the laundry room door and turned off the music. That’s all it took to bring the noise level down to an acceptable volume. Just shutting a door and pressing a button. That’s it.
After that, I took a deep breath and could finally focus.
Since that day, I’ve been paying attention to the background noises in my house.
I don’t keep the music off all day long and there are times when I open our back door to allow the outside noises in. But, I’m intentional about what noises I allow in my space.
I’ve also started to pay attention to noise when I’m starting to feel agitated. When I start feeling irritated, I immediately turn off or mute things to make the space quieter. It usually helps a lot.
My kids still make quite the racket sometimes, and I can’t always control that. But, when I stop all the other background noise, their playful noises don’t bother me as much.
Finding triggers and working around them is one of the things I help you figure out during my Mama’s Anger Management eCourse. It’s also filled with proven calm down strategies and insights into why we yell. This course has helped hundreds of people transform their houses from chaos to fun!
I promise it will change your life.
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