What a Peaceful Home with Kids REALLY Looks Like

It has been 3 weeks since I took the challenge to not yell at my kids for a full year.  It’s been another successful week and things are changing around here.

We are happier and our home is more peaceful.

Is it peaceful all the time?  No.

But, it’s peaceful most of the time.

I started this challenge because I was going in a downward spiral and something had to change.  Truthfully, I’m not usually a yeller.  Our house, over the years, has been very calm and peaceful.  But something happened late last year with me.  I wasn’t the calm, peaceful Mom that I used to be.

I started ranting, and raving.  I was angry a lot of the time.  I’m not even sure why.

I was in a funk, life was hard, and I took it out on my kids and my husband.  When I’m not good, emotionally, I yell and I was yelling a lot.  My children were scared.

So I decided to pull myself out of the funk, find a way to get happy, and stop the yelling.

Immediately, things started to improve.  Most of the change happened because I made the choice to be happy, to quit being angry and to find the joy in life again.

The day after I took the challenge, I was more playful, I was happier, and my children were happier.

Every day since then we have been overall happier, and living more fulfilled lives.

However, it is not always peaceful around here.  We have moments of frustration, anger, and sadness.  We are human and life is not always good.  Life can be hard.

But, since we are in a happier place overall, it’s easier to handle life’s difficulties together.

I’m not a perfect mom.  I still snap at my kids sometimes.  I still get exasperated and frustrated at their behavior.

My kids are not perfect either.  Their behavior can be frustrating and disappointing sometimes.

The truth is:

Having a peaceful home does not mean that it’s at peace all the time.  That expectation is unrealistic.  It’s not possible.

Having a peaceful home means being at peace a lot of the time. Messing up sometimes.  Picking up ourselves, apologizing, and moving on.

I’v discovered that, like most things, it ebbs and flows.  Sometimes we are perfectly in balance and life is peaceful.  Sometimes, life gets off balance and we don’t handle it very well.    That’s when we need to make the decision to change.

Parenthood is  messy.  It’s hard and perfection is just not possible.

We will all fail if we try to have a peaceful home 100% of the time.  For me, I try for 80% and forgive that 20% of mess ups.

I understand that that’s still a pretty high percentage to strive for.  Sometimes we need to ease into it.  We look for a 50/50 balance and then as we improve, our percentages change.  What percentage are you going to strive for?

 

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