Yes you, the Mom that just left her kids and husband to spend a week with her best friend.
You, the Mom who drops off her kids at the gym play area, works out for 30 minutes, and spends another 30 minutes checking facebook and drinking coffee.
You, them Mom who takes your kids to daycare so you can work.
You, the one who forces your child to be in his room for 2 hours for quiet time so you can get some alone time.
I feel your guilt for leaving your kids behind, so you can focus on you, but I admire your willingness to do so.
You already spend hours a day working for your family.
You lose sleep because of hungry babies, wet beds, and nightmares.
You do laundry, cook healthy meals, kiss boo-boos, play make-believe, and transport kids all over town for school and their activities.
You do it all.
Don’t you ever forget to do just a bit more, and do something just for you.
You see, when you do those things to take care of you, you are actually taking care of your entire family.
A happier, more fulfilled Mom can build happier more fulfilled kids.
It all goes back to the saying, “You can not give what you don’t have” Â So, it’s up to you to get happy, so you can give happy.
Show your kids that you are worthy of self-care.  Show your kids just how important it is to always live a fulfilled life. Show them that it’s important to take care of your own needs, and not just the needs of others.
Some may call you selfish, and you might hold a lot of guilt about it, but I say embrace it!
It’s okay.
Like my grandmother used to say “If Mama Ain’t Happy, Ain’t Nobody Happy!” Â So, good on you for finding your happy! Â Your kids will thank you for it later.
Love,
Well said! I always believed that kids need a mom who first loves and takes care of herself, then her partner, and her kids. Only then can they be happy—when their parents are happy!
Yes! I totally believe that happiness starts with the parents.
I struggled so hard everyday to make time for me. I have this image in my head about how the perfect mother should be. Needlessly to say, if I am the perfect mother, I am also unhappy because I don’t make the time for me. So… It’s a lesson in life, balance & patients…
Love is all about balance, and there is no such thing as the perfect parent. We are all just trying to do the best we can. Trust me, I might be good at self-care, but I drop the ball in other ways.
What a terrific post. This is something I’m endeavouring to do more of this year! More ME time! Don’t we all deserve it?
Yes we do!
I don’t understand why this is such a foreign concept to so many people! Especially Christians… we are constantly taught to love others as we love ourselves. That means we actually NEED to love and care for ourselves! Everything in moderation, of course, but in my experience NOTHING in this world lasts indefinitely without consistent maintenance.
I am just now learning to do more for myself it’s a hard transition. I recently started working from being a stay at home mom and I feel guilt enough for that. But with starting work I am learning how much I have lost myself, I have put everyone before myself. I just don’t know who I am any more but I’m working on it… I loved this post/letter!
Thanks for this post. So much wisdom in it!
Thank you 🙂
I love this so much! I read another article earlier today that I left feeling really guilty afterwards, because I have – after three years – established boundaries around “my time.” I think we need to start teaching our children at a young age that not only do we need self-care, we also need respect and boundaries for that self-care. There are so many posts out there about not interrupting our child’s play, we need to consider ourselves worthy of that same level or respect.
Man this is hard and something I struggle with consistently. I’m really trying to make it a priority and had to ask my husband for help in reminding me its ok. That dang mom guilt is a real pain in the butt!