Here’s something I’d like to say and I am a bit ashamed to admit….I compare my child to other children. Ohhh! I know I shouldn’t, but it’s so darn hard not to sometimes. Especially when you feel that your child is a bit behind in a certain area.
Here’s the story:
J took his first steps shortly after turning 10 months old. I was ecstatic! An early walker…how fun! I also knew (and said so at the time) that he would probably be a bit slower on his language development. You see sometimes a baby’s brain is so focused on learning one skill (like walking) that it doesn’t work on others as much (like language). Well, here we are 8 months later and J’s vocabulary is a bit smaller than other children’s his age. He only really started saying words that we understand last week.
We went for his well-baby visit today and the Dr. suggested that I keep a word diary of all the words that J says. She thinks that he is perfectly fine and that I’m just not aware of just how much he says. Hummm…..not aware? I am plugged into this kid 24/7…how can I not be aware?
Well I came home and immediately grabbed my notebook and wrote down all the words I remember him saying…13 words! The Dr. said that as long as he has 7 words than there’s nothing to worry about. So, what in the world was I so worried about?
You see, it’s my fault that I was so worried. I was walking around noticing all the toddlers my child’s age who were saying major words (like baboon) and stringing together 2 words and who have tons of words they use daily. I knew he was stating to mimic us by saying “ba” for bath and “du” for shoe, but they weren’t baboon! Whoa! I needed to take a step back…way back…and remember that every child is different and that my son is learning and thriving. Sometimes I need a kick in the butt…and that’s exactly what the Dr. did for me today. My son is fine and I’m just silly.
Whew…this motherhood thing is hard!
Plus…did you know that there is no correlation to language development and IQ? A genius may not say his first words until 2. So really…why worry?
Anyone out there ever had an experience like this where you just had to take a step back and look at things a bit differently?
I do that too! So much worse even if you have another kid yourself. I keep looking at Killian thinking, “Your sisters were crawling by now and you won’t even roll over to get toys. What is wrong with you?” Then the pediatrician reminds me that he’s not rolling over BECAUSE he has two big sisters that are always entertaining him!
I know exactly what you are saying. My daughter walked at 8 1/2 months. She is still behind in speech, but she’s fine or ahead of the group in most other things. It’s hard not to compare especially when other mom’s ask why your kid is not doing something like their kid.
I was like this in the beginning, especially with head lifting and rolling over – but then I got over it. Actually, it was you telling me that babies will focus on some skills over others that helped me step back and start enjoying my little guy more! He is still not walking at 11 months, and that is OK with me, especially since I can see the other ways he is developing! Aren’t they just amazing little beings?!